During our 41 years of marriage, my wife Linda and I had suffered few illnesses of any kind and none that affected both of us at the same time. I say had. Now we have.
Don KirklandIt began with Linda, who is rarely sick and unaccustomed to dealing with injury that restricts her movements or interferes with her plans.
Her latest plan was to paint the great room of our home as part of a makeover of that part of the house. Painting, often coupled with putting up wallpaper, is something she relishes in the off season when her teaching year is over.
It also was her downfall. Really.
Hurrying to answer a ringing telephone, she tripped over a rolled up rug in the great room and hit solidly on her right shoulder. A visit later that afternoon to our family physician confirmed what she had feared – a fracture. Though he never meant to, our 10-year-old grandson made matters worse. Curious about Linda’s injury, he sat down at our computer and keyed in the Latin name of the bone in contention. He could hardly wait to share the results of his Google search. “Grandy,” he announced, “your injury is common to the elderly.”
The prognosis: Six weeks with her arm immobilized in a sling should do the trick.
Typically, I am not the caregiver in my family. I once told my wife – jokingly, of course – that I was about ready for assisted living. Her reply was no joke: “You’ve had it for 41 years.”
I developed in my new role and discovered that most things are difficult, and some are impossible, for a right-handed wife to do with her left hand.
In the days after her injury, I grew more accustomed to, and effective at, providing the necessary care for my wife on the mend. Until, that is, I woke up at 2:30 one morning with enough pain in my arm to force me to the emergency room. From 3 a.m. until 6 p.m. I spent my day in the care of emergency room doctors and cardiologists. They assured me that I had not suffered a heart attack. I did, however, have blockage, which was relieved by the placement of stents three days later.
For the balance of the week after my procedure, I was not permitted to drive. Linda could not drive. Our daughter happily (I presume) carried her mom and me from place to place, assisted occasionally by sympathetic neighbors and longtime friends.
Our Sunday school class supplied us with a week’s worth and more (we love leftovers) of heart-healthy meals. Cards and phone calls, combined with frequent visits, cheered both of us.
Linda and I have been reminded of a fact of life that some take for granted and others refuse to accept. That truth is illustrated well in a favorite story of mine straight from the scriptures.
My childhood Bible hero was David. This simple, shepherd boy who possessed strong faith and supreme confidence conquered on behalf of his God and the children of Israel the giant Goliath. I longed to perform heroic feats myself, inspired by the example of David.
Later, King David ran head to head with another Philistine giant, Ishbi-benob. The Hebrew king, the “light of Israel,” did not fare as well as earlier in his life. David was weak and exhausted, and it appeared that this time he would become the victim rather than the victor. But as Ishbi-benob moved in for the kill, Abishai raced to his king’s side and killed the Philistine.
Our circumstances were certainly not as dire as David’s. Still, we recognized with even greater clarity, as did David, that we are not strong all of the time, and we need each other.
Because it is our nature to do so, Linda and I have spoken many words of apology to our helpers for “causing you so much trouble.” At the same time, we have assured them of our gratitude. Typically, they have brushed off the apologies.
The need that comes to each of us – in the physical, spiritual and emotional realms – is common to all humanity. The love that prompts others to prop us up on our leaning sides is divinely inspired.
We should always be ready to accept help from others when it is offered. And we should be ever willing and eager to provide help for others when it is needed. A rich spiritual blessing awaits all who do both in the name of Jesus.