Women have seven stages of life: infant, little girl, miss, young woman, young woman, young woman, and young woman. And any woman knows that the seven stages of a man are: infant, little boy, little boy, little boy, little boy, little boy, and little boy.
Most smart women know that a man is just a 10-year-old boy all grown up. He still wants a woman to think he’s wonderful. A 10-year-old boy is outside doing flips on the jungle gym for his mom. He says, “Mom, look at me. Aren’t I strong? Feel my muscles.” She agrees, “You are so strong. You’re so wonderful.” He always performs for his mother, and his mother always encourages him. But then something strange happens when he turns 16 or 17 years old. His mother starts to see the negative. Instead of watching him perform, she focuses on the things he needs to improve. He says, “Feel my muscles.” And she responds with, “Clean up your room,” or “Make better grades.”
Eventually he begins to look around for another woman. Ah-ha! “Feel my muscles. Aren’t I wonderful? Watch how hard I hit the ball.” The new woman says, “You’re wonderful! Let me feel your muscles. You’re so strong.” They get married. But if this woman isn’t careful, she will become like his mother and begin to focus on the negative. He still wants her to feel his muscles and tell him he is wonderful. What happens if she doesn’t? He starts to look for another woman. Most affairs don’t take place for physical reasons, but for psychological reasons. A man wants to hear that he’s good and wonderful and the best.
I’m not the best speaker in the world, but when Penny and I go to a conference where I’m on the program with several others, she always tells me I’m the best. I like that. That’s another way of saying, “Feel my muscles; aren’t I strong?” That’s what a man needs. He’s just a 10-year-old boy grown up. He wants to be noticed. Every little boy wants to be a hero, and the way to his heart is through his ego.
A “thank you” a day will keep the lawyers away. Ladies, when was the last time you told your husband you appreciated him for all his hard work? Better yet, tell other people how great your husband is. You say, “Wait a minute, Charles; he’s not very good.” Let me ask you something. Why did you marry him if he’s not very good? Did you look for someone who would make you miserable? Before you married, you convinced your parents how good he was. They may have told you that you weren’t old enough or that they didn’t like him, but you convinced them otherwise by telling them all the good things about him. What happened? Perhaps your husband isn’t wonderful anymore because you don’t say wonderful things about him anymore.
Start saying he’s the best, and he will start acting like the best. There is one slight problem, though. He probably doesn’t know how. He needs help, like a 10-year-old boy. Be specific. Don’t just say that you like flowers; be specific. A hint such as “I like flowers” doesn’t get the job done. That will go over his head, and he’ll bring home a package of seeds. You have to look him in the eye, show him flowers, and say, “On the next special occasion, roses like that would be nice, and I especially like the yellow ones.” Be direct.
If you tell him that you like to travel, he’ll come home with a road map. You have to say, “I want to go to the Grand Canyon with you.” Romance to a man is a woman telling him exactly what she wants. That’s freedom. He can accomplish what you want and ask you to feel his muscles. Men need specific directions.
Men hate to ask directions, but sometimes they must because they’re as lost as a ball in tall weeds. They know they don’t have a clue, so they do stop to ask directions; but, even then, male pride gets in the way. For instance, a guy will stop at a convenience store and ask the lady behind the counter for directions. “Do you know where Route 41 is?” She says, “Yes, it’s easy to find. Go to the third red light and take a left. Then go around the curve, but don’t take the next right. Go to the next right, and you’ll see a big tree. Go past the tree and turn on the next left. Go about half a mile and on the left you’ll see a big curve. Go past that curve and on past the next curve you’ll turn left, and you’ll be on Route 41.”
Every man in America will say, “Thank you very much.” He’ll go back to his car and he won’t have a clue where Route 41 is. His wife will ask, “Do you know where it is now?” And he’ll say, “She didn’t know.” He drives on and won’t ask again. There’s not a man in America who will say, “Excuse me, you’re going too fast. Could you slow down so I can make notes?”
Now, if the lady behind the counter takes the time to show him, we’re getting somewhere. She might say, “You know, I have to go right by there in just a few minutes. Why don’t you follow me? I’ll go slow, and when I honk the horn you’ll be there. I’ll turn the blinker on and you turn.” The man would say, “Thank you, God.” And he will find Route 41.
Ladies, this is how you work with a man if you want him to get somewhere; you have to take him slowly and be direct and specific. Remember, he’s a 10-year-old boy. If you tell him how to do it, he will. Why? So you can feel his muscles.