What comes to mind when you think of a homemaker? Maybe it’s a 1950s housewife with bouffant hair and an apron, happily washing windows. Maybe it’s the modern social media “trad wife” baking sourdough in her prairie dress. While neither of these images is inherently wrong, they both miss the mark on what it means to be a biblical homemaker. A biblical homemaker is not marked by her feminine outfits, perfect countenance, aesthetic home, her baking abilities, or lack thereof. She is marked by her faithfulness to God and service to her family.
In the book of Titus, after giving qualifications for the elders and men of the congregation, Paul pivots to instruct the women (Titus 2:3–5). One specific task for older women to teach the younger is to be a “keeper of the home.” In our modern language, we can understand this to mean “homemaker.” But what exactly does this mean practically? Is it simply a stay-at-home mom? Is a working woman unable to fulfill this obligation? Is the single or retired woman exempt from this calling?
The Home is for the People
I once heard it said, “The home is for the people, not the people for the home.” This simple contrast reflects the truth found in Mark 2:27, where Jesus teaches, “The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath.” In the same way, the home is a gift meant to bless and serve the people within it, not a standard they must constantly strive to maintain. Like most biblical principles, it’s easy, and often more comfortable, to fall into the ditches of either extreme. As homemakers, we can become so focused on cleanliness and appearance that we create a space that feels cold and unwelcoming. Our homes can become museums meant to impress rather than sanctuaries built to invite. On the other hand, a homemaker who neglects order altogether can create a home filled with stress and chaos, making rest and hospitality difficult. Both extremes miss the heart behind faithful homemaking.
The goal of homemaking is simple. Faithfully steward your home to glorify God and serve His people. When we focus primarily on our preferences and comforts, we fail to fulfill our duty as “keepers of the home.” The account of Martha and Mary in Luke 10:38–42 illustrates this beautifully. Jesus did not rebuke Martha’s service but rather her anxiousness and distraction. She had lost sight of what mattered most, the people in her home.
Different Seasons, Same Calling
As we move through different stages of our lives, we may be tempted to think that this command does not apply to us or that we have nothing meaningful to contribute to our homes. The single woman may think this is something to be done later in life, once she has married. A working mother, or one with young children, may believe she does not have the time or energy to fulfill this calling faithfully. The retired woman may think she has “done her time” with this task and can now use her home however she pleases. All of these mentalities ignore the clear commands of Scripture and God’s design for women.
Scripture does not limit the task of building, managing, and nurturing the home to a specific season of life. Women throughout the Bible are told to build their homes with wisdom (Prov. 14:1), manage their households well (1 Tim. 5:14), and look well to the ways of their home (Prov. 31:27). While this calling is shaped by life stages, it remains a faithful stewardship of biblical womanhood. Whether your home is quiet or full of little children, whether you’re in years of busyness or years of leisure, each woman has been given a home to keep. She must keep it faithfully.
Faithfulness Over Perfection
Faithful stewardship of the home is not measured by perfect outward appearances. It’s measured by steady, attentive care to the work given to each woman. Striving for perfection often leads to frustration, not only for the woman but for her family, while simple faithfulness frees a woman to serve her family well, within the limits of her season. Scripture instructs us to use wisdom, understanding, and knowledge in building our homes (Prov. 24:3–4). After giving instructions for the proper ordering of the Christian home, Paul rightly grounds the purpose of this service in the Lord, not in man. “Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward” (Col. 3:23–24).
Building a Well-Ordered Home
With these principles in mind, we can begin to apply them to better cultivate an environment where faithful service can take place.
- Build Rhythms: Creating simple patterns in your day, instead of rigid schedules, builds productive habits while allowing flexibility for interruptions. This could look like developing a basic cleaning routine with room to “catch up” another day when things unexpectedly arise. Throughout the day, have intentional resets to prevent messes from becoming overwhelming. Start necessary loads of laundry first thing in the morning, so they are not forgotten amid busy evenings. End your day with a closing shift- cleaning the kitchen, tidying common areas, and preparing for tomorrow. Consistent rhythms help us remain faithful despite the changing demands of homemaking.
- Plan Ahead: Keeping a running calendar and to-do list is key to managing a busy household. Have a central place in your home, or even on your phone, where you can quickly reference important information. Include sports, school, and work schedules, church events, doctors’ appointments, meal plans, shopping lists, and needed home maintenance. Develop meal-planning strategies so you are not scrambling at dinner time. Consider creating theme nights or a meal rotation to lighten the mental load. These practices help maintain order and prevent chaos during particularly busy seasons.
- Accept Limitations and Set Priorities: Even with planning and routines, you simply cannot do everything equally well. Homemaking requires recognizing the limits of your current season, deciding what matters most, and doing those things well. A mom to many young children cannot expect to have a spotless home, perfectly folded laundry, and gourmet dinners, while being attentive to the varying needs of her children. Likewise, the demands of older children with schooling, extracurriculars, jobs, and friendships can make it difficult to prioritize family connections and home management. It is foolish to believe that we can do it all. We must honestly evaluate our priorities, make adjustments when necessary, and take responsibility for what we can. Identify the minimum tasks needed to keep your home running, do those well, and then add in extra tasks as time allows.
- Train Up Your Children: We find the wisdom behind this principle in Proverbs 22:6. Though it can feel futile to train toddlers and young children in housework, the result is worth the diligent effort. Set the expectation that everyone contributes to the household. Bring young children along to help with housework so they can learn. Toddlers and young children can help with laundry and dishes, pick up toys, dust tables, and feed pets. As children grow, so should their responsibilities. Assign specific tasks and be consistent in follow-up to ensure they are completed. If you have multiple older children, consider dividing the home into “zones” that they maintain. Whichever approach you choose, set reasonable standards to avoid exasperating your children. With consistent training, older children and teenagers should become independent, productive members of the home.
- Submit to Your Husband: Contrary to popular belief, submission is not a dirty word. When practiced rightly, it is a joyful posture of trust and humility. Though much of the practical work of homemaking falls on the woman, a wise wife values her husband’s preferences and direction. Scripture calls wives to “submit to their husbands in all things” (Eph. 5:24), including homemaking. Ask for your husband’s input when establishing priorities, carefully listen to his concerns about the conditions of the home, and resist the temptation to believe the home is solely your domain to govern. The biblical homemaker considers others as more important than herself (Phil. 2:3) and seeks to bear one another’s burdens (Gal. 6:2). These small actions honor God’s design for the order of the home.
Biblical homemaking is about so much more than productivity and cleanliness. It’s about creating a sanctuary for your family, your community, and the church where people can be loved, served and the gospel can be proclaimed.
“You are as much serving God in looking after your own children, and training them up in God’s fear, and minding the house, and making your household a church for God, as you would be if you had been called to lead an army to battle for the Lord of hosts” — Charles Spurgeon
— Lauren Smith is a member of Abner Creek Baptist Church in Greer. She and her husband, Chris, have been married for nearly 15 years, and they have seven children.