The news about our son’s murder flashed around the globe quickly. Within an hour we heard from people. One of the first messages was a text. It read, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:9). It was a timely and well-thought truth, from a friend who loves and cares for us. Yet, as the weight of this tragedy settled on us that day, we thought, “Yeah, right. Put that on a sympathy card and sell it.” It’s not that we had stopped believing in the sufficiency of God’s sustaining grace. No, it was that the horror of the moment was just so crushing we couldn’t find consolation in even that wonderful promise.
HolmesLater that day, surrounded by family and friends, another Scripture was given to me. James 4:6: “But he gives us more grace.” Instantly we knew he would continue to give us more and more grace to see us through this tragedy until the morning comes, the dawning of joy in our sorrow.
C.S. Lewis wrote, “Pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our consciences, but shouts in our pains. It is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.” The pain of those hours and the reality of His provision did actually awaken us to the grace that He sent our way that very day, and in the days thereafter. In my own simple way of explanation he began to send us “grace ambulances,” little messages of grace to remind us who is in charge of all things, and to rescue us from the thoughts and questions of the hour.
He sent us kind and compassionate law enforcement officers, a Christian newspaper reporter who wrote an astounding front-page piece in our local paper, a TV reporter and camera crew who filmed us and broadcast our story in the hopes of assisting the police in their investigation. We were covered with prayer, and the many individual touches available to a high-tech world – e-mails, text messages, Facebook posts, Twitter updates, blog entries, and hundreds of calls, cards and food. At every turn were “grace ambulances” to enable us to support our daughter-in-law Katherine as she made decisions, planned services, and grieved.
While we were at the funeral home with Katherine on Tuesday, doing some of the hard things that are just unavoidable, a “grace ambulance” arrived on my iPhone that just about blew us all away. Brian and I had been playing the Words with Friends application on our phones. We had six games going at the time. When there is a move, when the game ends, or when there have been no moves for a while, the program sends you a “push” – a notice that it is your turn, or that the game is over. As we sat there, my iPhone signaled such a notification. The screen read, “BHOLMES WON!” This took our breath away. This “grace ambulance” reminded us in that moment of deep anguish that Brian had really won. Awesome!
In the belly of a fish, Jonah cried out to God. Jonah 2:8 is what he learned down there: “Those who cling to worthless idols forfeit the grace that could be theirs.” This isn’t about salvation. It’s about the grace God gives to guide us through “belly of a fish” days. All too often we are so wrapped up in our grief and pain that we miss the “grace ambulances” God is sending to rescue us.
God continues to give us his grace. We know He will provide what we need, and that in his time, we will wake up to that morning when the weeping will cease.
Your prayers and support are greatly appreciated. Thank you!